As a journalist-in-training, part of the job requires adequate knowledge of investigative reporting. Even when I’m not on-the-job, I feel like you always should ask questions and be suspicious of odd activity. I mean it’s important to be able to sense wary actions right under your nose. Such wary events could result in gossip and rumors that often spread like wildfire if juicy enough. I consider myself and other fellow staff members very inquisitive people. In fact, I’ve been playing detective over the last few weeks, yet quite valuable items around me have been disappearing. In order to investigate these suspicious circumstances, I grabbed my magnifying glass, deerstalker cap, and calabash pipe and proceeded to inspect.
By Tiffany Gilbert
Editor in Chief
As a journalist-in-training, part of the job requires adequate knowledge of investigative reporting. Even when I’m not on-the-job, I feel like you always should ask questions and be suspicious of odd activity. I mean it’s important to be able to sense wary actions right under your nose. Such wary events could result in gossip and rumors that often spread like wildfire, if juicy enough. I consider myself and other fellow staff members very inquisitive people. In fact, I’ve been playing detective over the last few weeks, yet quite valuable items around me have been disappearing. In order to investigate these suspicious circumstances, I grabbed my magnifying glass, deerstalker cap, and calabash pipe and proceeded to inspect.
It all started when I was down in the Setonian office, being productive as usual when I felt the need to tape a new drawing to the wall. I opened the filing cabinet drawer, where the tape dispenser was supposed to be but was missing. Impromptu questions began to arise: “Was the tape dispenser stolen, or could it simply be misplaced?”
I closed the drawer and scattered some papers across the desk searching for the roll of tape. I ducked my head under the table and slid off of the chair onto the floor to better search the unknown territory. So when Maddie, the Setonian layout editor, walked into the office and saw me as what she thought looked like a raccoon scavenging for food, I rolled out from underneath the table, concluding my curious investigation for the tape dispenser. With her one eyebrow-raised expression, I accurately reported back to her the case of the missing tape dispenser. Then I made a mental note, it was either missing in action (MIA) or stolen. The case was still open and I would continue the investigation later.
Later that week, at the Setonian meeting for this issue, it was brought to my attention that the trays in the cafeteria had “gone missing.” However, I remember seeing posters around campus about the cafeteria’s desire to take away trays. So, technically the trays were not stolen, they were taken and it is no big mystery, but why? I remember thinking, “How am I going to carry my silverware, drink, and plate at the same time?” I have a small palm and certainly no E.T. fingers to grasp and transport multiple objects across the cafeteria.
Bethany, the Setonian arts and entertainment editor, was assigned to investigate this case and can be read on page five. She took the initiative to ask the infamous who, what, when, where, why, and how questions and solved the case. It turns out, “going trayless” has to do with “going green,” a legitimate reason to help improve our campus and save our environment.
Eventually more suspicious events began to rise, like when my teacher started sending us email attachments that we could download and print out ourselves. Now, I don’t mind doing this since students have access to multiple printers around campus, free of charge. (Okay, there is a $100 lab fee per semester attached to tuition.) This was a faculty member who initially would bring enough handouts for the entire class so we would all surely have one. Each student would have access to a fresh handout and we had the opportunity to participate in class. Now with this new attachment-phase; it resulted in some problems. A few students would “forget” to print out a handout and would become an inconvenience to the other overachieving kids who pushed print immediately after receiving the email.
Although, this issue has not been made into a Setonian story just yet, the result of the mysterious email attachments and lack of handouts could possibly involve the little community of miniature aliens that inhabit the gardens on SHU’s campus. These little green creatures are hoarding our paper supplies and it’s way too expensive to continuously order more. For all of you who think this explanation is bogus, you’re right. No one has completely investigated both sides of this issue and quoted sources to prove it. For all you know, there are mini alien creatures living in the Grotto who steal SHU’s paper supplies. Maybe they are the ones who really wrote this article? If you’d like to believe it, it’s beyond me or anyone else to judge you, but do realize it’s a credibility issue I’m indirectly attempting to explain.
So when suspicions arise, what the Setonian staff does is question everything. We are constantly scribbling notes and names of sources that will help us explain these reasons for the missing trays or to disprove the case of the mini alien creatures (which we have yet to do). It’s easy to just assume the result or solution to a situation, but then it wouldn’t be factual and truthful and that is the Setonian staff’s job. So it’s not all that strange when I’m trying to solve the case of the missing tape dispenser or when the paper supply is being withheld. All we’re trying to do is present the facts and basically destroy all the fun of gossip, but isn’t best to just know the truth?